Sexual Curiosity At 36

As a millionaire European, I got stuck in the shuffle of first world problems, you know the type when you make a yerida to America to check in for a new way of life, people and compassion.

For my divorce that ended a marriage where I felt used and betrayed
by a woman who was caught up a sexual delay

Of a father who was owned by the mob
Trying to move me around like a chess piece slob
Awakened to a non-Jewish woman.

I never had sex before, but now I was intrigued to be forgiven for exploring my sexuality, for giving my minute to minute love. I practiced, I spent my days studying the style like a pro. I spent my idle days throwing money at women to just throw attention to myself and my sexual curiosity. I was surprised… at 36 I was better then I thought.

Each kind of genitals was a different kind of soft. I couldn’t believe at 36 I was still saving myself for a princess when I could practice my heart out and be a wiz for a queen. The more practice I got, the more empowered I felt to go after the girls with a clandestine shell.

Until day after day I got tired of looking at the shidduch resume of the girl I could assume who she was so well.

Trusted an old friend’s suggestion of a girl I had no intention to study analyze and glean like a daf in the talmud. She said trust me on this one and I happily agreed.

I met her in the park and spied at her from behind the trees. Nothing so special from the back and I walked up to her it happened so fast. She turned around at the same time and we clicked. Haven’t seen her naked yet, I thought, but perhaps it could be. That magical moment opened up a suggestion until I got to know her personality.

Her simplicity
Her honesty
Her sense of flair
Always struck me like a gift of its own
And something I want to see in a home
Of love
Of giving
Of making me glean
Who cares if her body doesn’t fit a magazine
She sparkles, she shakes
Passion from within
Never excusing herself for being out of the box.
And freaken strange. A bit. Love her. I hardly know her, I told myself, but I knew her too well it was scary. She weakens me to my knees. I want her to be the mother of my kids. Love. I want her. In my arms right now. Grateful to have this journey. Life is surely a blessing.

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