I am sick of being hungry.
I am done with not being able to feed myself.
I am so finished with not having energy, with having a racing heart.
I hate myself for not being able to nourish my body- the poor thing has been through enough.
Hurt so deeply from others.
Pained so profoundly from myself.
I hate myself for lying to people who love me, when I say, “It’s good to be on the recovery side of anorexia” when I know I’m sick again.
I don’t know how to get help.
I’m out of tears.
Dear Gd, please save me from this darkness.