Helpless

I feel helpless and hopeless.
life isn’t what it’s meant to be.
I’m unsure where to turn.
I want to be helped.
someone to wrap their hands around my heart with love and care.
cuz I feel so alone. my heart is so hurt and so full of pain and failure and hopelessness.
I can’t build myself up again.
it’s as though a tornado is starting up and dragging me in its endless whirlpool of disaster and failure.
but on the outside, on the outside.
I’m nice, I smile, I speak, I respond, I make eye contact, I connect, I laugh. I even show love and I pray.
maybe there is a reason for my shattered soul. maybe. and maybe not.

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3 Comments

  1. Elisheva Marissa November 22, 2017 at 11:11 am

    You are not alone…You are loved….if you feel comfortable contacting me you can and I will be your friend and pray for you… Hashem is with you, so just hold on! The valley of the shadow always hurts until we get by the streams of still water, and there is where your neshama will be restored.

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  2. Inconsolable Mother November 22, 2017 at 11:22 am

    Please please do not lose hope! Get help. Please!! If not for you then for your loved ones. Someone, somewhere, would be devastated. There are genuine people out here who wouldn’t want you to die, and I am one of them. I hear the hurt in your voice and the tears are falling down my face. Someone close to me feels the same way. I tell that person to put one foot in front of the other. Create a journal and write three things each day that you are thankful for. It could be “the sun came out today” or “I took a shower today”. Three things each day. Don’t stop. And build on it from there. Create a goal: meet with a friend, connect with someone in a coffee shop. Goals are important. Please give it a try. There’s an organization called Amudim, a jewish organization that can help you going forward. You can find it on the internet. Please reach out. Do not give up. Know that you are heard and though we are strangers, I care a great deal.

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  3. Anonymous November 23, 2017 at 9:18 pm

    My dear
    Hold on, look out for something positive in your life. It can’t be all dark and hopeless in there. Perhaps just right now it feels that way since your mind is so confused and twisted and uncertain that at times it all seems black and done with.
    Life has light in it. Seek it out. Pray more, connect to spirituality and good friends and good support, and with time, only with time and with much patience and with much self love and acceptance, Gd willing you will be able to see that light you are not seeing.
    I’m here for you, with love.💘 rachel

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