Are You OK?

I’m lying
When I say “I’m fine”

I’m lying
And it’s written across my face

I’m lying
Because you asked
When we weren’t alone

I’m lying
Because you used the same tone of voice
As someone making sure a child
“Went” before leaving

I’m lying
Because you clearly don’t have time now

I’m lying
Because my feelings
Aren’t just crap to be gotten out of the way

I’m lying
Because I want to see
If you care enough
To ask twice

I’m lying
Because I swore to myself
I wouldn’t make you listen to this again

I’m lying
Because I don’t want to burden you
More than I already am

I’m lying
Because I know I’m “different”
And will just make you uncomfortable

I’m lying
Because I don’t want to change you
I just wish things were different

I’m lying
But I don’t want to

1 Comment

  1. Binyamin Aryeh August 6, 2017 at 3:35 pm

    Perhaps you are ‘lying’ because you don’t yet know how else to deal with the cards you’ve been dealt?

    Really good therapy will help you see your way out of this situation. Yes, it really truly is possible.

    Please be very good to yourself and find an excellent therapist. You are worthy of every good thing.

    Reply

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